A few days ago I had several appointments I had to keep for the offspring and myself included. Late in the day I had a lovely conversation with a gal who was very interested in how I set goals. I wish we were talking about scoring goals, but alas it was the personal, attainable goals she was referring too.
I explained to her, there were the large picture goals. Such as finishing my degree. That came out of a work goal at evaluation time. Then there is the “where do I want to be in 5 years” goal, and the always popular “one day…” goal. She gave me one of those frowny faces and said “Ed, I want to know how you set short term goals”. I looked at her and matched the frowny face and said I don’t have a short term goal.
Apparently, I fail at short term goals. The frowny face proved it.
This made me think about short term goals. I guess in the bigger picture, I see my life as a series of calendars. Months go by, then years and there is hope I will achieve a goal or two along the way. Apparently this is a GIANT FAIL! She never said it to my face by the frowny face said it all. Then she said, those goals are vague, not attainable. She didn’t mean pursuing my degree, that apparently is an actual goal. She wanted to know how I decided what I was going to achieve goals within my week, and more specifically, my day. I explained that I get up, follow my routine for morning prep, get grouchy if it deviates from it, like have to make lunches on a day that is not on my schedule, leave the house and head into the office. Once I am at work, I have a serious of tasks that I need to do to help clients meet goals.
This is where she stopped me. I help clients meet goals, but can’t make a single goal for myself during my day? Again with the frowny face…EPIC FAIL! I make it sound more dramatic than it was, she was very kind and interesting. How am I possibly able to make into next week if I don’t count myself and my goals as important? Good question Frowny Face.
This reminded me of a conversation at lunch. Wally Banana was telling everyone she works full time 6 days a week. So She pays two ladies to come in and clean her home for $150. Everybody yelled “WHAT?!?!?” Wally B exclaimed, but I like it! The Bionic Woman wants to clean Wally’s house for $150, so did Polly. I didn’t. I had that job one summer, it is HARD WORK. It is bad enough I do my own house….blah! Then Wally was telling us about her massage she had. We all groaned. Of course we are jealous. We want a cleaning lady AND a massage too! Wally then said, “well, I guess I am selfish. Maybe I shouldn’t do this.” All I could think was, ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!?!?!
Why is it that women put their self last? Why is this? Their children come first, I think this is really important! Children can’t fend for themselves in the wild, that is why they have moms. Putting them first doesn’t mean they can have every single little thing they want. Food, Love, Affection, Clothes & Shelter should be high on the priority list. After that, fun stuff. Should children get more fun stuff than the mom? Hmmmm…..
I told Wally she deserves everything she gives herself, enjoy it, embrace it, ignore us because we are jealous. I am jealous. So I need to do something about it.
Frowny Face suggested I make a simple attainable goal everyday. I write in a red journal everyday, but this isn’t my goal. I decided to write a goal in the top right hand corner of my journal every night. The next morning I read it and think…Oh YA! I forgot about that goal! When I achieve it I give myself a happy face. If I don’t achieve it Frowny Face will be placed on that page. Once I get good at setting daily goals, I will move on to weekly goals. When I set a BIG HUGE goal for myself I tell the Universe about it. I say in my car out loud, I AM GOING TO DO…. The Universe needs to know if it is going to help me achieve it. I decided I need to tell the Universe my daily goals too.
Yesterday, my daily goal was to give myself some ME time. After dinner, I took myself to Chapters for some Chai, and Book browsing time. The Universe rewarded me with $2 book sale, meeting with some old friends that I use to work across the hall from, a very delicious extra hot beverage with no foam or water, and I facebook checked in to Chapters and the universe gave me a 40% off coupon for a regular priced book! WHOOOHOO! Thank you Universe! I used the coupon to help me tell the Universe about my next big goal.
I bought the Lonely Planet Travel Guide to New York City. Did you hear that Universe? I AM going to New York City. Don’t worry Universe, I don’t expect that trip to fall into my lap, I am willing to work for it. I called Santa and told him I would like to be a Face Painter again. I am buying myself a lap top for school, then saving the rest of the money for New York City. Am I spreading myself too thin? Sure I am! Do I like that? Secretly? I really do. Face Painting takes up a couple of hours every so often. Not so bad. I don’t have to say yes every time Santa emails me. I likely will, but I don’t have too. I am willing to work hard for what I want.
Do you hear that Frowny Face? I am making daily goals, AND I am working towards what I want.
The Universe has my back, we’ve got this.
So it will be either an EPIC FAIL or a SPECTACULAR ACCOMPLISHMENT. I will win, because I am competitive like that.