Dear Homework, Bite Me

Dear Homework,

You frustrate me.

There are days where you support me and make me feel special and smart. Those days I love you. I love how you make me think, look for the secret ingredient or challenge me in a positive way. I love it when you are easy and I can finish you in a snap. I love it when you help me learn something that enhances my job my work performance or make my relationships better. But lately you really piss me off.

I am frustrated that you do not respect my short comings. I am not a logical thinker. I am intuitive. Yet you force me to step outside my comfort zone, ask people for help, and generally make me feel like an idiot. I do not like it when you tease me with a possible short evening and here I sit night after night re-reading chapters trying to better understand them, but the information is freaking boring it flies out the window as I dream about places I’d rather be.

I also do not appreciate how you laugh at my schedule. You know darn well I am currently walking around, sleeping with my eyes open and yet you demand more. I have reached my limit. How do I know this? Chicken Hawk has come to work to fill in for Looby Loo. Her enthusiasm and energy put me to shame. I WANT TO BE LIKE THAT AGAIN!!! I think I have taken on too much. I dream of the day where I will only be busy and not bogged down. I want to play homework but you make me stay home. I can’t even go on a family picnic tomorrow because you are mean to me homework. NOT COOL!

How would YOU like it if I made you draw and paint, or blog and go to the Art Gallery or worse a MOVIE. You wouldn’t like THAT very much, would you? I should say not. Homework, you have even prevented me from laying on  my lounger on the back deck. Homework, my legs are PASTEY WHITE homework, white like that paste that weird kid in grade one ate. Again, NOT COOL! You are mean to me homework, plain old mean.

I do not want to hear it is for my own good, or this is the consequences of my actions. Shut Up Homework! No YOU Shut Up! I will never forgive you for making June suck.

…well… okay, I might forgive you one day.

I can picture that day very clearly in my head. That is the day I wear a cap and gown, walk across the stage to collect my MBA. I doubt I will be forgiving you that day. I will likely be thanking you.

Until then homework, you suck and you know it.

Yours Truly with No love at all,

ED

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10 thoughts on “Dear Homework, Bite Me

  1. Love it! You tell that homework how you really feel.

    I can’t believe I didn’t know you’re in school. Join the club of the walking dead Rob! Me too!!!

    Right now, I’m going on a week of 5 hours a night, less one last night because I decided that studying wasn’t enough-I also had to vacuum at 1 a.m.

    Is there an app for that???

  2. Chicken Hawk has more energy than you and is ever so slightly more enthusiastic because she doesn’t have two children, she doesn’t have three jobs, she is not in school, she is not attempting and achieving life altering goals nor is she walking 26 km a week. Now who is putting who to shame?

  3. I’m amazed at people that can get through school at our age. I can say “our age” because I know were the same age! In any case I cannot imagine working and taking and classes and especially doing homework… Ugh!! Keep at it and you’ll soon be done… yeah I know, easy for me to say!

  4. OMGoodness ET! I got a good laugh. You have such a great sense of humor. You sound exactly how my poor Nomad sounded last night. He was definitely beating his head on the desk. I hope that your homework gets it together soon and starts un-sucking!! ***hugs***

  5. Went to Prince George to watch Janet (one of Bob’s twin cousins) “walk accross the stage and accept her degree in nursing. She did it as a single mom and still held a full time job . . . which is similar to having two kids, a husband and a full time job Im sure!!! All of the students talked about how happy they are now that they are done and they have no more unreasonably long homework assignments or horrible papers to write. They all smiled walking accross the stage . . . huge smiles . . . and there were tears . . . lots of tears . . . probably tears of relief! All my love and support. L.

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