Cayman Islands or Glitter in the Air?

Have you ever?

Glitter in the air
Glitter in the air (Photo credit: chasezzz)

Yes or No?

What the freak are you talking about? Well… I spent my day chilling at Teachers Convention. This was the first time in Years that I have come away with thoughts that apply to me personally. Often it is stuff that I need to adapt for me or my classroom. Today the underlying message was values and what do YOU value. When it boils down to it, I value Trust, Kindness and Empathy. The interesting thing about these values is I have to compromise them often. One wouldn’t think so, but how I see Trust, Kindness and Empathy is not the same way others see it. Just like when I think of positive selftalk – other people think they are being positive…but it’s not the same to me.

One of these sessions was a slide show presentation with Pink’s Glitter in the Air playing in the background. I had never really stop to think about the lyrics until I saw pictures to go with each line. This gave me pause and nearly moved me to tears. Here I had spent a large part of my day distracting my thoughts by saying “Cancel that” in my head. When I say stuff in my head people can’t hear me…often. Where were my thoughts? Cayman Islands. Why? Lots of reasons and most of them you can guess. I tried to be present and by saying “Cancel That” to my thoughts, it became easier to focus. Listening to the lyrics made me think about what I had done or not done with my life. It made me think about compromising my values. Trust, Kindness and Empathy. Trust is one I have the hardest time adhering to. Trust and Honesty are close cousins. Honesty is harder for me than Trust. Lets be frank, everyone lies. Honesty is hard. These lyrics made look closely at my values. It made me think about wanting a Mulligan.

Have you ever fed a lover with just your hands? Yes

Have you ever thrown a fistful of glitter in the air? I had to think about it but yes!

Have you ever looked fear in the face and said I just don’t care? Not until recently, now I can say yes!

Have you hated yourself for staring at the phone? You betcha!

Have you ever been touched so gently that you had to cry? Yes, even thinking about it still makes me cry.

Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside? Yes…did I regret it? Never.

Have you ever wished for an endless night? Yes…did it happen? Of course not…I still think about that night and still wish it lasted forever.

Have you ever held your breath and asked yourself, Will it ever get better than tonight?

There came a point where I stopped asking and wishing. How would you answer these questions? Maybe I shouldn’t stop asking and wishing or maybe I need to act. At any rate I need to ask myself Will it get better than tonight? Hmmm….if everyone is searching for that elusive happiness how do you know you have it when you find it? It was suggested today that happiness is a series of benchmarks along the way. I have had quite a few happy moments. Although it’s been a while since I have had one. I miss them.

I am grateful for what I have. I am smart about the choices I am making. Yet I still  feel like I am missing that special something. That magic formula that says DING! Now you can be happy! Intellectually, I know that isn’t possible. Today was a good start. I see the goal, now I need to achieve it with many little steps along the way. Just to figure out how…

Advertisements

10 thoughts on “Cayman Islands or Glitter in the Air?

  1. I love P!nk. I’m quite sure that I am not her target audience, but her lyrics really speak to me. I love artists that can put their self-exploration out there like she does. Warts and all. There it is. Self-doubt, self-loathing, self-celebration. All of it. Love her! 🙂

  2. I’m not quite sure why I have been giving the same response to about three people this week but perhaps it is something that is meant to be said or perhaps it is meant for me.

    I decided not to try to be happy. I don’t look to be happy and I’m ‘happier’ because of it. I strive for contentment in every and any situation life throws my way. I’m never really so down in the valley or high on the mountain top. Just even keel. To be happy someone or something has to make me that way. I don’t want anyone or anything to have that much control over me. I’m not going to sit and wait for happiness to come to me when life if full of joy just being content. That’s just me though.

    1. That is because the focus is off of happy and just on being. I have been being for over a year. I am happier – but that is a relative term. I think life is about ebs and flows. I am currently on a downswing and that is good because that is when I learn the most. Being happy isn’t a environment where I gain knowledge. Laughter and happiness are currently missing from my life. But knowledge has incressed exponentially and THAT is a good thing. I am ready for the pendulum to swing back…it’s time.

Keep the conversation going!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s