Goodbye, Farewell, The End

In one month it will be the second anniversary of the Edmonton Tourist Project ( I woke up this morning and realized it is the third anniversary! WOW 3 years!).

I can no longer recognize the girl I use to be.

I began this site as a way to help me become accountable, take risks, heal the hurt and become the person I dreamed I could. I learned the difference between goals and dreams. A goal is a way to realize your dreams and wishes. I have learned the secret to goal achievement and it is satisfying in ways I never thought possible.

I will graduate in December. WOW. I once never dreamed I was smart enough for University. Now I find it mundane and limiting in my learning. Looking forward to having letters after my name. It automatically gets people’s attention when the reality is, I was just as smart before, but now I know how to put it all together. That is progress.

I say yes more often to try things and no more often when I have taken on too much or just really don’t want to do something.

I have traveled solo and figured out where I begin and my family ends. This was also important for me. I needed to learn boundaries.

I have learned and practice great nutrition. I have lost nearly 95lbs in two years. I have  another 90lbs to go, BUT it has become habit. Great food choices made of REAL food have taught me to listen to my body. I know what it needs and when it needs it. Eating gratuitous sugar because it is someones birthday is rarely worth the calories. It has to be OUTSTANDING before I will spend calories on sugar laden food because there are consequences to those actions. I either eat less, work out more or gain some temporary weight. Neither of those options are awesome. So I choose carefully.

I have learned that loving someone doesn’t mean it has to be a married relationship or a parental one. I love my girlfriends, fella friends, and family with a fierce intensity that I didn’t know existed within me. This has given me permission to spend time with those people and the ones I just like…get less time or none because my time is limited and valuable. It doesn’t mean you are not valuable it just means I am prioritising my life. I come first, then family, then friends, then school, then work. Work is last because it is a means to a lifestyle. However, it made the list so you can be sure work is filled with passion. If it isn’t on the list, it lacks passion. Without passion, I have no desire to put in an effort. That was my problem before the project. I had my priorities mixed up. I need to nurture me so I can nurture my passions.

That makes it simple.

I place me first for the reason listed above, however, I didn’t put into what ME means:

I have learned I am a social introvert. I like socializing but not all the time. Please don’t drop in on me, call first. There is a list of people who are welcome to drop in and that list includes my mom, dad, sister, my best friend and George Clooney. Call first or I get cranky.

I need to include fitness in my life for lots of reasons, but the big one is if I have to face surgery for my brain tumour, then I want to be as fit and healthy as possible. Death does not scare me, but my children still need their mommy for the time being and I intend to be there as they need me. Being THE MOM is a responsibility that I do believe I was created for. I take it seriously and approach it with humor and humility. I have raised amazing humans and can’t wait to see how they shape their future.

I need to read. I need to continue learning and I need to sit in stillness and reflect. This is what defines me. Include fitness in there and those things need to be done alone for me. That is my recharge time. People exhaust me, I love them but I need that space away – and often, like everyday.

I need to set goals to reach new dreams. Goal setting and dream achieving is simply amazeballs.

So does this means I am fixed and no longer need the Edmonton Tourist Project? Well?

I have been think about that a lot while I run. Running has become my focus and passion lately. Writing is my creative outlet. I am writing 2 books right now. They tumble out of me like movies. That leaves me with nothing left to say on the Edmonton Tourist Project. While my growth continues, I no longer feel blogging about it is the right platform.

That must mean this is the end.

I am so incredibly grateful to those of you who have supported me all the way along. I have met incredible bloggy friends along the way, some turned into real life friends, some have drifted away and others have died. This tells me that endings do not have to be bad. Happy endings are lovely too.

Is my blogging career over? NO WAY! I am devoting my writing over at my health and fitness blog called Me and MO. Mo is short for momentum. You can find it HERE or http://justmeandmo.wordpress.com/  It is the same me who looks at life slightly skewed with humor in her brain and wit on the tongue.

I get it if all that running and nutrition talk isn’t for you. I do understand that. It isn’t for everybody. For now it is where I need to be.

Soon I will close this site, revamp it and change it into something different. But I am taking the summer off.

This feels right. It is time to say goodbye to old me and embrace the me I really am. It kind of feels like the final episode of M*A*S*H* and I feel like BJ. Not wanting to say it but needing to.

Keep in touch friends.

MASH_4077_Goodbye_thumb

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15 thoughts on “Goodbye, Farewell, The End

  1. Selfishly, nooo!!!! But, in reality, I’m super proud of you and thankful that you have shared your story and your voice with us. You were one of the first bloggers I followed when I started (wow-that’s been a year and half now!) and you were always an inspiration. Good luck on those books, enjoy those runs and have a spectacular summer:)

  2. Aww Robyn! I’ll so miss your crazy stories!!!! They were such a good inspiration for mine. 😉 You’ve done so much in two years, your next nap should be at least half that. So many endings in sight, hey? Thanks for sharing your story. I’ve enjoyed it muchly. My only regret is that I wish I had been with ya and been able to read right from the beginning. PS – What WILL our letters behind our names be once we are graduated???

  3. This has been one of my fav blogs-and I guess it all started because we are brain tumor buddies? Love that you are taking on a new cloak and challenge…love your attitude(s). Glad to have been with you on this ride.

  4. Definitely sorry to see you go, but you have to do what’s right for you. Besides, we’ll stay in touch regardless! I thought you had an acoustic neuroma or something much less serious than a malignant tumor…

    1. It isn’t a malignant tumor but it is growing and that is not cool because my brain is being squished and my head just isn’t big enough to support both, contrary to popular opinion. One of them has to go. In selfish moments I think a lobotomy might be useful then someone would have to take care of me. 😀

      1. I realized after I left the comment it probably wasn’t malignant because that would imply you were knocking on death’s door, and clearly that isn’t the case. Still…kinda scary. I don’t suggest the lobotomy, though. You won’t be able to engage George Clooney in a very good conversation if you go that route.

  5. Love you dear friend and I can relate so impeccably with your sentiments and transformation. You will continue to do great and wonderful things with your Me and Mo blog. I wish you the best in this next chapter of life and blogging! 🙂 Look forward to it! Hugs

  6. Wow, this actually made me tear up a bit as you were literally one of the very first people I came across when I started writing. You and Kelly Lockyer. You are a special person and I’m super proud of your successes. Thankfully we have connected via FB so I will still see you around there. Kim and I have recently decided to make a lifestyle and diet change. She wants to drop about 50 lbs, me about 30 lbs. We’ve already kicked it up a notch with what we eat, but your success certainly helps make those goals seem achievable. I wish you the most success with everything that comes next, your health, your family, your books, everything. Please stay in touch!!
    Steve

    1. Its surprising to me how people are reacting to me not posting on the Edmonton Tourist! I have something new brewing for the fall, it will be more about living out loud and being rather than finding out who I want to be. Its aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalll good! Good luck to you ans Kim! I can tell you nothing about a lifestyle change is easy, however….it is TOTALLY worth it!
      Thanks Steve…you will always remain my favorite goat farmer xxx

  7. Aw, that’s a shame to see you leave this blog, but hopefully you’ll still be around to talk books (can’t wait to read yours)! Wishing you the best of health, and hope you achieve all your dreams! 🙂

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