The Master Jedi Dishwasher

I was out with the girls the other day when we stumbled upon this lovely gem of a sign:

What struck me was two things, 1> the title – Master Jedi! It gave importance to the role of Dishwasher. It made me want to quit my job and work there! I bet it is amazing to be able to float the dishes into the sink from the counter. I need to perfect my Jedi skills first.

And 2> Apply with resume? Seriously? I wash dishes all the time. At work, at home at my mother’s when she has us over for dinner. It’s a simple process really. Fill the sink with hot soapy water. Add dirty dishes. Wipe with cloth. Place on counter to dry – OR have someone else dry them for you. Simple. Done. If one of those newfangled dishwashers are involved, well, I’m sure it comes with an instruction manual.

It made me think about my current position. My job title is SNA. Sure that acronym stands for something. It stands for words that explain what I do. BORING. Nothing half as exciting as Jedi Master. I have decided I need to jazz up my job title. If it is fabulous enough I am going to submit it to our HR person and ask for a formal job title change. Here are a few that come to mind:

  • Super Narly Academic – I like how it makes me sound smart and cool in a disgusting way
  • Saber-tooth Neanderthal Alternative – I like the way it makes me sound aggressive
  • Soothsaying NASA Antagonist – again it makes me sound brilliant (thanks to the NASA part) yet it also says all knowing pain in the ass,which is also true!

I am open to suggestions. I need to spice up my Job Title. Maybe something that comes with a red cape might be nice…